Not saying it definitely happened, but it definitely could’ve.

Taken from “Ep #1 – Rick Moranis & Sushi Pizza | Sketchy Friends Podcast”
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Transcript:
oh this segment’s called fake conspiracy
[Music] oh
[ __ ] um it’s just
an observation that we’ve made
that kind of
points out the truth to something so it
may not be something publicly known but
you’re we’re going to be your exclusive
first look
we need to what actually goes down in
the world we are a society
um so what do you guys think uh
i’m just going to say it
rick moran has killed tupac guys
is that what we were supposed to do
honey he shrunk his dick honey he shrunk
tupac’s life
okay i regret that
honey he shot the puck okay wait
hold on what are you saying rick moranis
killed right right
honey i shrunk the kids fame
was tupac’s killer
how you need me to lay this out very
much so all right guys
do you have it on paper oh i got it all
on paper okay guys i mean i got
deets i got the notes i’ve done my
research i know what happened i know
what happened all right so
let me give you a bit of background
information
who is rick moranis
what the hell was that so i had no place
to put my hands look there’s nothing
wrong with that i’m just saying what
what what is this
i love you guys i know you guys very
well
i
there’s a reason you don’t see what’s
going on under the table
that’s our thing
and our thing separate look this can’t
be a full level this isn’t uh what do
you call it polite polygamy polygamy
polygamy a site should it be though
you would
you would uh anyways rick moran has
killed tupac let me give you some
background information so rick moranis
as we all know he’s a he’s a
huge in the 90s and the i think even the
80s um i wasn’t around then i wasn’t
seeing movies
you know i wasn’t born um
but yeah huge star back in the day he
retired um in
uh
you know in the mid 90s uh presumably to
take care of his kids after his wife
died in 1991. no this is all facts these
are facts everything i’m going to say
here the factual facts okay
his last movie before he retired was big
bully with tom arnold
it’s very little known movie i didn’t
know about it before
you know i had this realization that
rick moranis was the one that did this
um but yeah it’s called big bully it
came out in january of 1996.
keep in mind eight months before tupac
died yeah so there’s enough time for it
to go to theaters
go to vhs
and basically die off it into the ether
oh yeah it’s got tom arnold in it he’s
got tom arnold [ __ ] what’d you expect
mr roseanne bar himself at the time i
think he had the mullet for her
mullet
my mullet’s better his mold is better do
you think so yeah oh yeah um but yeah
the movie was god-awful i think it if i
remember right when i checked it was a
zero on rotten tomatoes
uh yeah no yeah yeah again the actual
factual zero if i can remember right i
believe it was a zero on rotten tomatoes
now that rating may have changed because
i went in there and i was like yes best
movie ever
only comment
was from me and tom arnold um
but yeah it was a 14 million dollar
budget and it bombed it made only two
million
when it was released
so you know studio lost 12 million out
of that huge vlog
so that was rick moranis last movie um
tupac
was killed on september 13th 1996 in las
vegas
uh
once again eight months after big bully
came out
um
rick moranis has been claiming that he
he did retire because his his wife did
pass away unfortunately due to cancer
in 1991 and he wanted to be around to
raise his children typical cover-up now
here’s where the speculation begins
if his wife passed away in 1991
what was he doing for five years
masturbating making shitty movies oh
funny
i jerked myself
um so here here’s honey i [ __ ] my okay
so here’s how this here’s how it all
went down so after big bully bombed he
went rick moranis he was he was
devastated he went to vegas to just blow
off some steam you know rick moran is
big playboy you know he he was in the
drugs the drinking the smoking the the
gambler
yeah so he went to vegas to blow off
some steam he was bummed out over big
bully just
flopping
uh he was experimenting with some drugs
quick question yeah did he direct and
produce that movie like
i believe he just acted okay yeah why do
you ask but but you guys got to keep in
mind he is such a method actor
that he he he would he was fully
compassionate he doesn’t even wear the
glasses in real life it was his fake
lenses
yeah well there’s a lot of things he’s
faking guys
um
is the wife even real
that i confirm yeah
is she a metaphor for tupac
anyways anyways wow so he’s in vegas he
loses all his money and he’s he’s just
completely high on hallucinogens um so
his his posse
you know he was always rolling around in
his posse you know he’s got his guys he
rolls deep he rolls deep you know ain’t
nobody getting near him uh they got in
the back they got in their cadillac they
started driving home yeah
rick’s in the back seat and he’s just
staring out the window and he’s like god
how did everything get so bad
you know why did it come to this
you know he’s just having some deep
thoughts for a for a dude that’s that’s
tripping off the the electric kool-aid
yeah
um
little giants was this smashing electric
cooler the electric kool-aid you know
he’s just rolling on some disco biscuits
going
down
going down east flamingo and just
thinking where’d it all go wrong um so
they did pull up to a stop light at east
flamingo and covalene
as we all know is the infamous
intersection where tupac was murdered um
to his left he noticed a bmw with a
pretty recognizable face pull-up in the
passenger seat
we know
that that was tupac
and suge and shook
um
rick
being the high [ __ ] that he was
tom arnold himself
because we all know tom arnold holds a
very strong resemblance to tupac
uh and he was he was high have you seen
him
[ __ ] kite what can you blame him
that’s the next conspiracy is tom arnold
uh
so yeah i mean
submission impossible he looked over and
he he saw his co-star
who in little background info tom arnold
played his bully who was nicknamed fang
in the movie and he was nicknamed fang
because he had like one of his canine
teeth was pretty long and sharp wow so
it looked like he had a thing
uh but yeah he’s upset about the movie
he sees the guy that portrayed his bully
he’s a method actor he can’t separate
reality from the plot one of the best
yeah still can’t get over the role still
can
um so
what’s he do when he sees his his
nemesis his rival
tom arnold was in the back seat
of the car no we know it was tupac
rick moranis being high on on the nose
nachos yeah looked over and he didn’t
see tupac
what if he saw tom arnold in the [ __ ] backseat
maybe
maybe
all we know is that he saw tom arnold
and then he saw red
and tupac was rolling with fang the
whole time
the name like bang
yeah he’s rolling everywhere yeah so i
mean you know you know and i mean rick
mourinho is notorious for always keeping
that thing on him he’s always got his
heater
on him um it it didn’t help at all that
tom’s role in the movie was
his bully
you know and he’s like you know what i’m
finally going to stick up for myself
i’m gonna get payback for this movie
flopping because it’s this
motherfucker’s fault i keep pointing
over here because the car was to the
left i checked
wait it was yeah yeah that’s the picture
anyways yeah i am rick and i’m just full
of [ __ ] hatred fury um
so yeah i wrote down here since rick
moranis was always known to keep that
thing on him uh the drugs and the
resentment had gotten the best of him
and he drew his weapon and started
unloading into the bmw beside him
thinking he was finally putting an end
to tom arnold’s treachery
unbeknownst to him at the moment
possibly the most revered hip-hop artist
in history was fatally wounded in that
car
uh rick’s crew
obviously they freaked out
you know they peeled out they they drove
off into the night uh
i can only imagine that in that moment
uh
rick was in the back
with a smug little smile on his face as
he lit up a fat cuban
suge style and and you know he had that
feeling of satisfaction that he he rid
the world of a menace
um
so the next morning rick woke up in a
hotel in a motel motel in the nevada
desert his crew they freaked out they
dropped him off they said you need the
knight
rick’s waking up thinking
wow i can’t believe i killed tom arnold
you know what a feat what a
you know um he turns on the news and
what does he see
wait so this is year what 96 96
september of 96. wasn’t
he’s still on how long did roseanne go
for
roseanne
yeah rick mourinho roseanne no tom
arnold tom arnold i mean tom arnold’s
not a part of this tom arnold killed
nobody he was never there rick moranis
thought he saw tom arnold i thought he
was in the backseat
dude you gotta listen you said he was in
the backseat acai
um
so yeah no rick moranis he turns on the
news and he sees the hip-hop artist
tupac is in the hospital in critical
condition
that’s when the memories start flooding
in
that’s when rick starts oh my god
oh my god he starts pacing back and
forth throughout the motel room i
thought it was fang i thought it was
fang
uh
um
you know and it freaked him out i mean
rick is a g
rick moranis is is
they call him rick moranis you know
because that’s what he gets
no but he he’s a baller but he’s also a
human being he’s got a conscious he’s
got a conscience so uh he’s a thug but
he’s the love of the heart you know
um he realized that even if he had
killed tom arnold he was never going to
feel pride in himself again
you know he he just
took a true artist out of this world
away from everybody or at least in that
moment
you know they’re in critical condition
you know tupac didn’t die for another
six days
um
but i mean he he said he’s never gonna
let the drugs get to him again he’s
never gonna let the drugs own him
um
rehab
is there any probably eventually i was
only around for the murder
i don’t know what happened after i’ll
just try to get the series of events
here so in addition to quitting the
drugs on the spot you know rick said i’m
never doing them again i’m done um he
also realized he probably needed to lay
low
you know i mean he just murdered a man
he’s he can’t be out he can’t be trying
to do more movies i could just shrink
myself
now you know the reboot plot um
but it was a perfect point for him to
just kind of fade in to
the background you know his big his
movie just flopped
you know he had kids at home that he
needed to raise he shouldn’t be out in
vegas just partying
absolutely irresponsible i mean i think
he he’s like the pit bull of the 90s
but it was it was it was easy for rick
to turn down any offers that came his
way
um because his movie was such a flop so
there weren’t many offers coming in so
his last movie it was book big bully big
bully was his last movie okay
i’ve never heard of it never i actually
watched it
to research this yeah uh
i would have accidentally killed tupac
too
he was clearly on the sauce
yeah i mean he
well that’s the thing is
the movie is about him being bullied
as a grown man
so he’s let me give you a little
synopsis of the movie
so it’s rick moranis as a kid
is bullied by tom arnold as a kid
by faint okay
rick moranis uh
moves away
as a kid
comes back to town to be a teacher
when he’s an adult
and as a name as a grown man he comes
back as a baby
see i told you the plot’s terrible i
mean i believe it i just want to make
sure
he comes back he comes back to teach his
his old middle school when he’s an adult
and tom arnold’s
character is the wood shop teacher
um
before he moved away
uh tom arnold’s character stole like a
moon rock from a school assembly
and
rick moranis’s character snitched on him
so tom arnold got taken away to re
reform school basically like kid prison
and his parents dipped him like like he
he had to go to an orphanage he ruined
tom arnold’s life you know as revenge
for bullying him
uh
so yeah basically tom arnold’s bullying
him again as an adult
um
and it’s just crazy okay i gotta watch
this thing it’s on amazon this is great
i’m not gonna watch it
it wasn’t like the jokes were pretty
funny
like one of his friends from his
childhood is a pr a pyro
and uh when he goes back and grows when
he grows up and goes back to his
hometown the same dude’s uh firefighter
and he pulls up at a fire truck holding
a cigarette he’s like david how you
doing
it is [ __ ] hilarious but um
yeah i mean in
typical 90s movie there’s one black
person in the entire movie that sounds
typical yeah in a rick moore asphalt i
don’t think there was any black people
in
any little little giants uh honey i
shrunk my
dick uh
little giants i think there weren’t
i don’t know i don’t remember
yeah
the quarterback
the kid quarterback on the other team
was oh
it’s like a game of where’s waldo in the
90s because there’s no diversity in
movies absolutely not not in the rick
miranda
real white [ __ ] right well i mean after
you know
realizing that rick moran has killed
tupac
i don’t want to see him again you know
i’m glad he’s just no but i mean
uh i mean he didn’t he didn’t need to
forget hollywood because hollywood
forgot about him
glad he faded into black um
i’ve got here i mean he cleaned up his
act raised his children he moved on with
his life
however he carries the guilt and the
pain of knowing that he rick moranis
ended tupac’s life and he’s probably
just sitting in his bedroom listening to
who shot you
oh

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