NBC’s 1990 Hanna-Barbera’s horror cartoon Gravedale High, (also known as Rick Moranis in Gravedale High).
Transcript:
[Music] um
is
[Music] please take a seat yeah
[Music] [Applause] and chilling
[Music] hello
[Music] [Applause] uh
[Music] good morning mr schneider sir
crawford i told you to stop playing in
the faculty parking lot
see you’ve lost another life oh
and how is life treating you this
morning mr schneider
better than it’s trading clawford head
mistress crone
thanks again for the personalized
parking plot i’m honored
you’ve earned it you took over the class
of misfit kids that i was ready to expel
ah deep down they’re just normal kids
normal monster kids well
keep up the good work tata
schneider
does this one belong to you cleophatra
are you okay
no i’m not okay it’s all mr boneyard’s
fault
for not getting bigger doors on this
crate
if i bust a bandage i’m gonna sue don’t
scream yourself quill
i’ll help you out
sorry mr schneider that’s okay
i heal quickly
no way man promises promise
you know schneider you’re all right for
a human
gee that means a lot coming from a
monster like you mr boneyard
well guess that’s it
hey you forgot about me what’s the big
idea
let me out of here sorry sid didn’t
notice you
oh that’s the story of my life are you
kidding me sid are you okay
yeah i guess but i was yelling so hard i
got a sore throat
when you’re an invisible kid no one ever
notices you that’s why i’m the class
clown
thank you so much
pretty funny sid but you don’t have to
be the class clown
i know you’re here
[Music] yes
[Music] [Music] oh
[Music] hmm
[Applause] i warned you about yelling in the
hallway seymour
now come with me hey hey let go of my
ear
[Music] morning mr tuttner
moaning schneider yeah
i had tutor for history that two
thousand year old breath is
murder
boy little schneider gets a lot of this
well this is really me
[Music] i couldn’t do a thing with my snake this
morning cleo
don’t worry doozer i’ll whip them into
shape before vinnie gets here
cleo how many times do i have to tell
you i do
not have a crush on vinnie stoker
[Music] hey that’s my diary get it back
sometimes
i wonder if vinnie stoker even knows i’m
alive this is juicy stuff man
hand over the diary flathead hey back up
bimbo
[Applause] what’s going on here he swiped my diary
what does please everybody back to your
seats
what about my diary hey somebody lose a
book
kinda looks like a diary vinny stoker
read that and you’re
dead i can live with that
glad you could join us vinny
[Music] oh
[Music] now that i’ve got everyone’s undivided
attention we can begin today’s class
with a very simple question what do you
want to be when you grow up
and in frankenstein’s case i hope it’s
not an artist oh oh i know what i want
to be
okay sid you’re on great because that’s
exactly where i want to be
on stage with a packed audience standing
room only
move over robin williams because here
comes sid the invisible comic oh
fantastic
[Music] come on kids let’s hear your clap sid’s
gonna do
a monster rap hey there reggie you’re
super smart
when it comes to chicks you need a jump
start
and cleo here is always grooving talking
or eating her mouth’s always moving
branch has yards a credit card they’re
all expired
but so is she she shopped till she
dropped now she’s a zombie
jp’s at work that don’t need to work
cause he’s got big bucks but he’s such a
[Music] jerk
[Music] very funny sid come on class let’s hear
it for sid
[Music] thank you for that warm applause you’re
a great audience
fine sid now let’s hear from someone
else well hey i’m just getting warmed up
i’ve got lots of jokes and what about my
michael jackson impression
a zipper on it sid yeah you stink man
okay now that’s enough settle down or
we’re not going to accomplish anything
hey forget it peach we’re not supposed
to accomplish anything
why do you think we’re in this dead-end
class huh
i can tell you why i’m in this class i’m
here to teach
and as long as i am you’re here to learn
and if you can’t handle that mr stoker
there’s the window whoa teach hey don’t
bust
a blood vessel i was just thinking out
loud whoa
sorry i’m late teacher dude but there
were some bodacious waves breaking down
in the swamp
hey gil watch where you’re slinging that
seaweed i’m sorry sid dude
didn’t see ya hey little dude
hey cleo don’t bogart those french flies
well glad you could join us gil now
let’s continue our discussion on what we
all want to be when we grow up
i want my own dance club the snake pit
i want to be the wealthiest monster in
the world
and i want to marry the wealthiest
monster in the world
rally i do i’m getting a job in the
country dude
i want to do stand up sit down i want to
be the first monster astronaut to fly
into space
i flew on a jet once but the turbulence
made me lose my launch
you mean like man then all these people
started crowding around me
i was so embarrassed i almost died again
but what about you vinny what do you
want to be hey i can only be one thing
peach
cool
are you all right come closer so did you
hear the one about the priest the rabbi
and the monster
watch all the racket in here
uh oh it’s sid head mistress crone he
seems to be seriously ill
no really there’s nothing wrong i was
just don’t interrupt
we’re concerned about maybe we should
take him to the school nurse
she ran off what about a doctor he ran
off with the nurse
really there’s no need then i better get
him to community hospital
that’s a human hospital
what’s your diagnosis doctor well i
don’t see any problem of course
i don’t see any patient either i’m not
sick i tell you
that’s what they all say hmm this
doesn’t look
normal to me this should coat his tongue
so we can get a good look at him come on
boy
open up yeah
say
we need more tests
i hope i did the right thing maybe i
shouldn’t have left sid all alone at the
hospital
calm down mr snyder the faculty lounge
is a place for rest and relaxation
ah yes we all come here to unwind
between classes
would you can’t join me it is tempting
miss durge but there’s no way i can
relax until i find out if sid is all
right
there there mr schneider i’m sure those
human doctors won’t find anything wrong
with sit
in fact i’m sure they won’t find sid
well if you ask me
it’s all schneider’s fault
sid probably caught some nasty disease
from you
told you not to hire a human whatever
happened to monster pride
ignore him mr schneider we’re not all
human haters like
coach cadaver some of us even think that
humans are
cute
it’s almost visiting hour at the
hospital
[Music] i’m gonna take some of sid’s classmates
over to see him
oh and don’t forget the faculty brunch
on sunday morning
it’s open casket
[Music] [Applause] i hope you like my new suit jp can i get
you
anything else some bad jerky would be
nice
shark surfing is radical man yeah little
dude they’re more primo than jet skis
but they’re a lot harder to turn ting
yeah
i think i’ll take a little dip i need to
practice my cannonball
whoa if she’s getting in i’m getting out
[Music] [Music] mega cannonball do that you really
thrash that board
okay kids let’s hit the showers we’re
going to visit sid
hit the human hospital
no way jose humans are creepy man
you couldn’t even pay me to go well
teach
looks like we’re not going i’m really
surprised
sid’s a monster just like the rest of
you i thought you’d at least be looking
out for each other
but i guess you’re just looking out for
yourselves
[Music] teacher dude overboard
[Music] ah he’s not breathing we have to get him
to the hospital
forget it man i’m not going hey wrong
we’re all going
[Music] hey mr schneider we’ll be at the
hospital soon hey boneyard
step on it man mr schneider seems to be
going into shock
i’m afraid this may be serious i’m like
shocked myself
teacher dude is looking way trashed oh
great that’s all we need is another
great deal step for a teacher
i hope he has a good life insurance
policy
hey yo up there boneyard shake a
leg this ain’t no funeral yet yeah
we don’t get mr schneider to the
hospital quick he might not make it
i’m not used to driving on human roads
cleo
i must observe and follow their peculiar
[Music] [Music] habits
[Music] all right hal open up something
wrong officer okay wise guy
what excuse you have for running that
red
[Music] we are going into the hospital holy
toledo
a bus load of accident victims follow me
i’ll give you an escort
i hope we’re not too late no we’re right
on time
visiting hours have just started he’s
recovered
it’s america whoa mega miracle
hey that was no miracle teach trick this
into coming here
that’s cool well as long as we’re all
here let’s drop in on sid
don’t worry son x-rays are perfectly
safe
oh really then why are you fellas
dressed for a nuclear meltdown
just as i suspected yes i’m afraid we’ll
have to remove his tonsils
tonsils ouch babe i’m out of here and i
mean that
if i catch any human germs in here mr
schneider
you’re going to hear from my attorney
hospitals hold bad memories for me jp
last time i was in one i die
riley i did i know you kids are a little
nervous but
just think how happy sid will be when he
sees your faces
[Music] this is sid’s room and that’s it stop
but sid’s not here
at least i don’t think he is sid are you
in here at least she left his lunch
cold and soggy just the way i like it
you kids stay here
i’ll go find the nurse
ew smells like your new perfume blanch
rally it does
well i never
uh actually this mixture appears to be a
medicinal solution of magnesia
mixed in with pink dye number 16.
this stuff tastes like surfboard wax
what are these doctor dudes trying to do
to that poor little invisible dude
waste him we gotta find sid man i say we
split up and look for him
no one’s taking out my tonsils hex said
fire stage left galloping all the way
an invisible man please don’t hurt us
we’re just kids hey i’m not gonna hurt
you
i’m a kid too except i’m invisible
i’m very ticklish too darling hey
you’re not scary you’re funny oh you
think that’s funny
i bet you’ve never seen an invisible
michael jackson juggle
i love you i love you all
i understand you haven’t seen him but
you couldn’t have seen him because he’s
invisible
yo sid that’s cool
whoa a snack bar
cool cinny
where are you what is this burn victim
doing wandering the halls
look at these bandages i’ll bet they
haven’t been changed in years
2 000 years and let me go i have to find
sid
ah babies are so cute even human babies
catchy kitty cool
[Music] babies just love me
[Music] well i can’t find sid but at least i can
do some shopping
[Music] oh dear you shouldn’t be on your feet
here
let me help you
gracious what service why i must shop
here more often
i concur doctor these x-rays are
inconclusive
inconclusive why it’s perfectly obvious
that the lumbar vertebrae is pressing on
the sciatic nerve causing severe back
spasms
hi george is right
[Music] check this out little dude i’m hanging
six
[Music] well look out geezer dude
radical tandem style
[Music] this is just wonderful not only have i
lost sid now i’ve lost my whole class
you were right mr schneider there was
nothing to be afraid of
hospitals are great i got a full rewrap
for
free hey refreshments ain’t bad either
i got to make a diagnosis i got to chew
up the babies in the maternity war
and i got to do some shopping really i
did
radical time dude this hospital place is
the best man
no don’t tell us you’re here to visit
the invisible kid who just had his
tonsils out
[Applause] [Music] sid you’re the greatest but you better
rest your voice
thanks you kids want to try some monster
ice cream
you’re so funny well
what do you think mr schneider you did
it sid standing room only
[Music] [Applause] hey kids one of your favorite rap
artists has a new show on nbc
so get ready to wrap with kitten play
premiering next
only on nbc
[Music]

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